for six year since she was born, she was so close to her father (do any of you remember your memory for six years after you were born??) started when she was a little girl she never feel love from a men called as a father. a father who was suppose to protect family from any danger. a father who was suppose strive hard to support family. she was too young to understand what is happening to her mother that day. all she know is her father need to work and to busy to come home. reality is not like what she thought. its too difficult for her elder brother and sister who understand to accept the reality.but for a child like her, she so naive. to her everything is fine and her father will always love and miss her whenever he go. just like what will she do for the rest of her life.
day by day is passing by. she still wait for him to come home. it was sad when looking at her doing that always. (could you bear to look a child like that??) month by month is passing by. she started busy with school stuff. now she rarely wait for her father to come back. until one day she forget about the fact that she have a father out there.
people proud with their father. their father is a successful men. when come to her...... she prefer to talk about other thing or topic rather than talk about her father. the main reason is she do not remember any thing about her father. there was never a sweet memory between them. not even one that she can ever remember. since that she will try to escape when facing that that topic.
teen. is difficult for her. every thing is relay to her mother. her mother is doing all the work that her father should do. meanwhile her mother also need to do the tedious house work and managing all her siblings. it is hard for a single mother to do all the work alone. for her, her mother is her father. now the little naive girl is a grown up woman. she happy with her life. without a father only a mother and other siblings.
after 11 years living without father. something is changing. remarry. her mother get married with a religious men. who can guide her mother and her whole family. she so happy with her mother even though it hard for her to accept other men in her family except her only brothers.
a few month after the marriage. she still do not call the men dad or even father. she never know how to interact with a father. it awkward. it silly. from that moment, she started to thing how do father talk to their children?? how do a father interact with his children?? from what she know. men are different when dealing with their children. they are different when be friend with. they are different when serious. (are they like that??)
a father day.. she never celebrate that day. now she still do not celebrate the day and do not know how to celebrate it. for her, the men will never be her father. no one can ever replace her father. even though with all the bad and cruel thing that her father have done to her family in past. he will forever be her father.
